These are not shoes. These are house slippers. These are what Charlie wears, not you. I guess your dad must have dodged the draft and moved to Quebec when the Vietnam war was raging. Good for you, Comrade. You can't wear these ugly pieces of shit out of the house and pretend you aren't wearing your slippers. You may as well wear your bathrobe. While you are at it, just buy a fucking conical straw hat as well and go full Vietnamese. My friend Erik has a conical hat, and he's never been to Vietnam. So I know they sell them domestically somewhere. What asshat celebrity first started wearing them and made every other lemming leap off the cliff clad in these Ho Chi Minh cruisers? Well congratulations, you've weakened a nation today. I'm sure Toms get the job done if you are harvesting rice or sleeping off a hangover on the sofa with golf on TV, but if you are planning to walk on pavement, then enjoy your collapsed arches. Above and beyond everything else, they're fucking ugly. So what is the draw? Being uncomfortable and looking bad while doing it? If so, then great success.
bitter much?
ReplyDeleteQuite bitter, thanks for noticing.
ReplyDeleteHow many Viet Vets does it take to change a lightbulb?
ReplyDeleteYOU DON'T KNOW MAN, YOU WERE'NT THERE!
Toms Shoes are like wearable pet rocks. Definately rejects at garage sales that nobody wants. When I see that US college educated (a req) kids "intern" for a bed and $50 week at Tom's SoCal Hdqtrs so Blake can get rich and be a highly paid guest speaker, or colleges feature Tom's as an excellent business model...I REALIZE THAT THERE IS NOT MUCH TIME LEFT for us IN THE US
I think we just might be soulmates! Hilarious anf so true!
ReplyDeleteI buy kung fu shoes in Chinatown for $4.00. Each purchase I make goes to help children; The owner of the shop has kids, they crewmen of the boat that brought it to me has kids, and the person who made the shoe is probably a kid who would either be starving or selling their bodies were it not for the shoe factory.
ReplyDeleteI think the kung fu shoes are better quality.
Prolly coming from Chinee Falun Gong prison factory along with our Halloween decorations. Another excellent biniss model from our most favored trading partner along with selling female babies for $50k. I did see a couple of homeless dudes in Baltimore wearing nice NEW looking Tommie Slippers! It Definately made them look like they were from Argentina, post 2001 Menem caused meltdown.
ReplyDelete