People Standing up on Public Transit are Dog Shit on the Heel of Society

If you picked Chicago up and moved it to India, the people who are standing upright on public transit buses and trains would be the lowest form of scum in the Caste System, the "Untouchables". If you don't have a seat on public transit, you may as well be a black person in antebellum South Carolina, because you don't have a single fucking right in the world. Everyone sitting down hates you. And I don't mean "doesn't like you", but "fucking hates your sorry ass". They don't want you to touch them. They don't want you to breathe on them. They don't want you anywhere near their space. They will glare at you like a dog that just shit on the floor in front of company if you have the misfortune of momentarily losing balance and so much as touch the corner of their book or newspaper. They would prefer you fall out of the door and be run over by the back wheels of the bus, and die, than to even consider touching one of their shoes with your own shoe. But it doesn't stop there. The bus driver hates you just as much. He/she (and occasionally a He-She) is constantly telling your stupid, bovine fucking ass to move to the back of the bus, or not stand next to the door sensor in the back. Do you know who else hates you just as much? The other people standing up. They don't want you touching them. They don't want you breathing on them. They fucking hate you with the fury of a thousand suns for the mere fact that you had the audacity to board the same bus that they are forced to stand on. If the bus suddenly stops and everyone goes flying into one another, the person you ran into will wish you dead on the spot for running into them, despite the fact they hit the person in front of them. In every possible scenario you lose. Someone sitting down farts, it drifts to your nose. Someone standing up farts, it drifts into your nose. Hot air rises. Hell, chicks can get finger-blasted against their will and have no legal recourse whatsoever. If you get finger-blasted unwillingly while sitting down on the bus, they have courts for that. But it is understood by the U.S. legal system that if you are standing on that same bus and are penetrated through force, there are no laws to protect you. The lawyer will gravely shake his head "no" as you plead with him to take your case. When you get on that bus and there are no seats, you have two choices: A) Knowingly forfeit all your rights as a U.S. citizen and human being or B) Step right back off the bus and hail a cab. Just know that if you choose option A, you are an un-person.