Monday, June 6, 2011

Could Someone Please Tell Maria Shriver to Quit being such a Pussy






Your husband fathered a child with an employee behind your back. WAAAAHHHHH! Shut the fuck up already. Who did you think you married, A.C. Green? You married Arnold Fucking Schwarzenegger. Do you think he made himself look like this so he could be a one-snatch kind of guy? You knew what you were getting into; you're a Kennedy for Christ's sake. The Kennedy's invented spousal infidelity. Your uncles are like the Michelangelo and DaVinci of cheating on women. Now granted, your uncles were not plowing appalingly ugly common field hands like your Austrian beaux, but they were widely dispersing their seed none-the-less. So save all of us the feigned shock and horror and move on with your $500,000,000 and start getting nailed by your 19 year old Brazilian pool boy such as your birthright entitles you. I guess the daytime TV crowd will probably feel sorry for you, but that is only because Oprah tells them to. No one else gives a shit. Would you ask the sun not to shine Maria? Would you ask the bee not to sting? Of course you wouldn't. So why would you ask Arnold to quit chasing tail?

2 comments:

  1. No kidding. Did she never view Pumping Iron before tying the knot with Ahnold?

    NP

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  2. oh come on you guys.....have some compassion....RFLMAO.....reminds me of one of my favorite movie scenes I like to drag out everytime I think I have been screwed over....KillBill2.

    "you knew I was a murdering bastard when you married me"

    "yea...but I thought I was special"

    ReplyDelete