Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Two Words, When Used Together, Guaranteed to Creep Women Out

Moist Panties. Utter that phrase together and you will undoubtedly send shivers up the spine of the woman you are talking to. When used alone, no big deal: The grass is moist from the dew; Don't get your panties in a bunch. Neither of those sentences would illicit a response from anyone. But put them together for a show-stopper such as: "I bet you have extremely moist panties right now". Boom, Creeped. The fuck. Out. Give it a try sometime. Saying something extremely offensive like "Cunt" is fine, but really you are just going to piss them off and cause them to shout at you. My friend Gerald once began a sentence with a group member in college with "Listen you fucking cunt.....". Sure that was offensive. She got pissed and yelled and it escalated from there. But if you say "I bet this [insert something] makes your panties sooooo moist", that conversation is over. I would venture to say the relationship--whatever its nature--is terminated as well.

If you use the phrase "moist panties" in conversation with a woman, and she's into it, then all bets are off. Anything from her letting your college lacrosse team run a train on her, all the way up to her stabbing you to death during sex and drinking your blood, are in play.

4 comments:

  1. Ha - "Gerald". I am sure that bitch deserved every bit of being told to shut her cunt mouth.

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  2. I despised any and all group projects in college...I would have loved to have sat in on that session though.

    NP

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